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Wrestling-Kommentatoren

Kommentatoren
Heenan-Zitate
Lawler-Zitate

Nr. Spruch
1(zu Bret Hart)
Brain: "They named a bird call after you. It's called 'cheap.'"
2(während einer Beschreibung von Gene Okerlund, wie man Golf spielt)
Okerlund: "It's very important, first of all, to address the ball."
Brain: "Hello, ball!"
3"I smell a title change...Or is that you?"
4Brain: "How many kids does Helen Hart have?"
McMahon: "I believe 12, Mr. Heenan."
Brain: "Oh, one of each."
5(über Ricky Steamboat, nachdem Gorilla ihn fragte, warum er ihn nicht managt)
Brain: "Yeah, but if the guy burps the wrong way, there go your eyebrows."
6Brain: "How much does he pay you to sing the praises of him all the time?"
Gorilla:" Who, the Hitman?"
Brain: "Yes."
Gorilla: "Do you know how long he's been in the World Wrestling Federation?"
Brain: "Too long."
Gorilla: "He'll be here when you're gone, Brain."
Brain: "What'd you hear?"
7Anvil: "That Dragon's got a lot of heart." Brain: "Yeah, heartburn."
8(über Monsoon)
Brain: "The guy wears glasses. He takes his glasses off and lays them outside, he starts a forest fire."
9Brain: "Did you ever have a thunb jammed in your eye?"
Ross: "No, and I don't care to experience it."
Brain: "Turn around here, I'll show you."
Ross: "No, thanks." Brain: "I don't mind."
Ross: "Well, let me thumb you."
Brain: "I'd mind that."
10Brain: "You know, I could make a lot of money with Typhoon."
Ross: "How would you do that?"
Brain: "Well, I wouldn't have him wrestle. I'd take him to shopping centers and let kids ride him for a couple of bucks."
11Heenan: "I didn't know Bret Hart's mother is Joan Rivers?"
Monsoon: "Will you stop!"
12(bei Wrestlemania VIII zu Gorilla)
Brain: "I heard you referred to Sid Justice in a paper the other day as 'Psycho Sid.'"
13"If they (Bushwackers) were twins, Luke is so dumb, he wouldn't know when his brother's birthday was."
14"They're (Bushwackers) living proof that the 3 stooges had children."
15"She's (Sapphire) good to have at picnics. Keeps the flies off the food."
16"You know why the Kid's not doing well? Look at the time. It's a half hour past his bedtime."
17"It's very easy to beat the 1-2-3 Kid. You put a glass of milk down and a couple of Oreo cookies. When he goes for 'em, put the boots to him."
18"I asked Stu Hart earlier, I said 'Stu, you gotta be proud of your boys.' He said 'I have boys?'"
19"Wouldn't you classify that 20 members of the Hart family living together is classified as a ghetto."
20"Stu just yelled over to Helen 'Helen, I'm Damp!'"
21Brain: "I hope the director doesn't show the Hart family anymore."
McMahon: "Why?"
Brain: "Oh, the phone will be ringing off the hook over at 'America's Most Wanted.'"
22(über die "Boston Bruins" - Jacke, die Stu trug)
Brain: "Oh, there's a picture of Helen on the back of his jacket."
23(über einen Mann, der verprügelt wurde)
Brain: "It could be worse McMahon. It could be me."
24"You know, the Undertaker's gonna start a new basketball team. That's for guys six feet and under."
25"I know all about cheating. I've had six very successful marriages."
26"With Duggan, taking a shower is a high risk maneuver."
27Brain: "You know, if you kiss a woman's hand here in Nashville, it's the same as kissing their foot."
Schivone: "Why do you say that?"
Brain: "Same size, same aroma."
28"There's only two kinds of music I don't like... Country and Western."
29"Giving the Nasty Boys the Tag Team of the year award is like giving the Cindy Crawford beauty award to Roseanne Barr."
30(als Sherri mit Harlem Heat auf der Rampe erschien)
Brain: "Boy Schivone, look at the size of those... guys."
31Brain: "You know what they call a woman with 2 million dollars?"
Schivone: "What?"
Brain: "Divorced."
32"I'll tell ya. If I didn't have 11 girlfriends, Sherri'd be number one."
33(Hennan bei WCW Saturday Night, bei einem Match von Meng gegen den Jobber Ken Brewer)
Brain: "Well Mr. Brewer is like the Milwaukee Brewers, neither of em' are going anyplace this year!"
34(Bobby Heenan bei WCW Saturday Night am 30. April 1995)
Brain: "This is the most backward, upside-down organization I've ever seen!"
35Brain: "You know who won Miss Bucksnort last year?"
Tony: "Who?"
Brain: "A bloodhound."
36Brain: "Do you know what Tatanka means?"
Vince: "I'm not sure."
Brain: "It means "Squaw with red hair"."
37Brain: "Who was that with Sting?"
Tony: "Mike Tenay."
Brain: "Are you sure that's not Wink Martindale?"
38Brain: "I figured out who the Patriot is."
Tony: "Who?"
Brain: "Where is he from?"
Tony: "Washington D.C."
Brain: "It's Al Gore."
39(zu Tony Schiavone)
Brain: "You're a fun guy. First you go to Tiger Stadium when there's no baseball. Then you go to the car factory on a Saturday when there's people laid off. Maybe tommorrow we can go to the park and watch grass grow."
40Brain: "Whack yourself between the eyes 10 times and see how you feel."
Tony: "Well, I'm not Terry Funk. That's different."
Brain: "Well, if you don't mind, I'll do it for you."
41(über Antonio Inoki)
Brain: "Does he have an entourage with him? I saw three rickshaws parked out back."
42"The money's the same, whether you earn it or scam it."
43Tony: "Bunkhouse Buck would like a punch like that. So would Johnny B. Badd."
Brain: "So would your mother-in-law."
44(nachdem Ricky Steamboat mit einem Finger in ein Auge gestochen wurde)
Brain: "I don't know why he's whining. He's got two of 'em."
45Tony: "I think the fans are pretty much divided as to who their favourite is."
Brain: "Yes. One half loves Flair, the other half hates Steamboat."
46(als Cactus Jack gegen die Ringabsperrung krachte)
47Brain: "You'd better get somebody down here. That rail could be damaged."
48(über die Haare des Gaurdian Angel)
Brain: "That's a nice haircut, if you're going to the chair."
49(in Paris)
Brain: "Just like Glens Falls for Jim Duggan. They don't speak English there either."
50(nachdem Duggan Yokozuna biss)
Brain: "Duggan'll probably be hungry in an hour."
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